Better than being in court.

On or about this date in 2013, I was asked to speak at a banquet honoring a gentleman named Ken Bussart, pictured in a wheelchair, along with my wife, Dawn, and me. This was different, though. The address would be recorded on video played at the banquet in Ken’s honor. For me, it was a new experience. In court, I delivered opening and closing arguments essentially without notes.

For this, I wanted notes and wrote out my comments. When I arrived for the taping, I sat in the open sitting on a tall chair similar to a barstool. The problem was immediately apparent—I would be sitting and reading. The optics wouldn’t be great; worst of all, I’d be sitting in the audience, watching it. Not only that, but I thought it would be posted on YouTube. What should have been heartfelt would instead be preserved forever as me looking like a sixth-grader reading a book report to my class.

It’s not on YouTube, though I wish it were. I tried to get a copy for years but couldn’t. What follows is from my Facebook Memories today. For whatever reason, it won’t share. Following is the original writing.

I took part in a video today, which may or may not be on YouTube. The logo was added just to catch your attention. I’ve been interviewed for television news, been a guest on some radio shows over the years, including hosting, and have done two or three training videos in the past. So, a question-and-answer format is easy to do.

What I found odd about this one was that I asked the woman if she would ask me questions or if I was supposed to speak off the top of my head about the subject. It’s for an awards banquet, so I can’t go into that aspect now, but she asked if I knew what the award was all about. I knew a little, but not enough. She said she would read what the award was about, and we could use that as a starting point.

So she did and said she wanted to know how it related to the person being honored. It was nice of her to read me the full award description in advance. So, just by way of chat, I told her. She listened, asked questions, I’d tell her some more. Finally, she said that it sounded good or great; however, she worded it. I said thanks and told her I wasn’t sure I could do that again because, really, I didn’t know if I’d remember what I had just said since it wasn’t rehearsed. I thought it was a good practice run, though. Plus, I had some notes as an outline.

But no, the camera had been running while I was chatting with her about the award and what I thought I would say once we started. We were done except for a final few words while I looked directly at the camera. And I’ll probably look fat to boot!

Happy Mother’s Day

Proverbs 31:26-27 is closely tied to Mother’s Day, as it celebrates the wisdom, kindness, and diligence of a good woman, qualities often embodied by mothers.

Verse 26 describes a woman who speaks with wisdom and imparts kindness, reflecting the nurturing and guiding role that mothers fulfill.

Verse 27 emphasizes her care for her household, illustrating a mother’s unwavering commitment to her family’s well-being. This is where my wife would likely insert the idea that a mother’s love for her child(ren) is unconditional.

Proverbs 31, written between 600 and 1000 years before the birth of Christ, shares lessons from the writer’s mother and is traditionally attributed to King Solomon. The words remain just as true today, particularly in verse 27.

This passage highlights a mother’s diligence, responsibility, and care in managing her home and fulfilling her roles as nurturer, provider, protector, and guide.

Consider this: mothers ensure their family’s needs are met, whether through physical care, emotional support, or spiritual guidance.

Even the phrase “does not eat the bread of idleness” is significant, meaning no rest. Mothers are actively engaged in making decisions and fostering a loving environment.

Beyond all this, as if there could be more, mothers often juggle multiple responsibilities: caretaking, teaching, and mentoring, and their influence extends far beyond the home, shaping the values and character of future generations.

The last sentence turned into a paragraph that resonated deeply with me.

I added verse 28 as a special touch, just in case my wife happens to see this. The original image only had the first two verses, but something felt incomplete. Before posting, I took another look and discovered verse 28—unmarked, yet present. It felt like God was working overtime for me. I wanted her to know how much I love her and to wish her a very Happy Mother’s Day!

Back to my Roots

It’s unfortunate to write something like this every year, but it was a busy time on the phone with parents. My feeling today is that if an attorney needs to be called, there’s some bad parenting going on.

Celebrating Mother’s Day After Divorce

What I write here also applies when Father’s Day rolls around. Both days are a special time for each parent and their children. On Mother’s Day, children express love and appreciation for their mothers. The way it was once celebrated changes after divorce, but the kids’ feelings don’t, aside from the fact that most kids would like to see their parents still together. I learned this as Guardian ad Litem.

Mother’s Day after divorce can cause stress or tension between parents and sometimes other family members. It shouldn’t. It should be a day to show your kids that even though Mom and Dad aren’t together, everyone respects Mom’s role in the family (and Dad’s on Father’s Day).

If divorced, treat Mother’s and Father’s Day as parent-specific holidays. Regardless of the visitation schedule, kids should be able to spend each occasion with the celebrated parent. Likewise, a mom should be able to enjoy a fun, stress-free day spent with her kids. However, come June and Father’s Day, the roles are reversed again.

Suppose, though, the parents do not live close to each other. The drive may not be convenient, but it is a weekend, and something can be arranged. If not, children should be encouraged to call or have a little video chat with their mom. The other parent should work with the kids to come up with gift ideas for Mom, just as Mom should do the same for Dad on Father’s Day if the situation is reversed. I believe an essential key is to keep the kids as actively involved as much as possible.

You may have divorced your spouse, but you didn’t divorce your kids. You may have custody, but this doesn’t mean the other parent is no longer a parent. It’s about working together as parents for the kids’ best interests.

In the past, you had a way of celebrating holidays. Those days are over, so it’s time to develop new ideas and new traditions. And hey, maybe mom and dad can suck it up for a couple of hours and get together with the kids for brunch or dinner. Consider the children’s ages and what message it may send them.

Happy Mother’s Day, and next month, Happy Father’s Day! 

 

VE-DAY + 80 YEARS

Albert P. Ebacher Papers, Box 1, SHAEF Mission Accomplished Outgoing Message 5-7-45

“The mission of this Allied Force was fulfilled at 0241, local time, May 7, 1945. Eisenhower”

Such a simple yet powerful statement marked the war’s official end in Europe, at least from the military perspective. Eisenhower’s words were remarkably concise, especially given the years of struggle that preceded them. The political and ceremonial end came the next day, May 8, with the second surrender in Berlin.

Despite Eisenhower’s matter-of-fact approach, the world reacted with celebrations, especially in the United Kingdom and the United States. Streets were filled with people rejoicing at the long-awaited victory. There was still work to be done in rebuilding Europe, and a war to be fought and finished in the Pacific.

I love the simplicity. Eisenhower didn’t make it about himself at all. His leadership was characterized by pragmatism rather than personal ambition, which is why his statement was likely understated. The victory belonged to the millions who fought and sacrificed, not to any one individual.

#VEDay #simplicity #Leadership

 

 

 

 

On This Day

On this date in 1961, Alan Shepard made history on May 5, 1961, with a 15-minute suborbital flight aboard Freedom 7. Later, he would return to command Apollo 14 in 1971, making him the only one of the original astronauts to land on the Moon.

Unlike the gals doing it earlier this year in their form-fitting blue suits, it was a little different for Shepard. He didn’t have make-up artists getting him ready to prance in front of cameras, entering the capsule. His capsule was so small that the height requirement for astronauts was 5’11” or less just to fit in the cramped space. He had to wait several hours from when he woke up until liftoff. Is that important? In a way, it is.

The flight had been postponed several times. The United States would have launched the first man if not for the delays. In the interim, Russia beat us to it. And it was almost delayed on the day of the launch. Nature called as Shepard sat in Freedom 7, forcing him to empty his bladder into his suit.

Medical sensors attached to it to track the astronaut’s condition in flight were turned off to avoid shorting them out. The urine pooled in the small of his back, where his undergarment absorbed it.

But we learn by trial and error. After Shepard’s flight, the space suit was modified, and by the time of Gus Grissom’s flight two months later, it included a liquid waste collection feature built in.

I learned three funny things researching this, one that made me do a literal LOL. The first was Shepard, who later recalled his wife Louise’s response when he told her that she had her arms around the man who would be the first man in space: “Who let a Russian in here?”

The second was on May 18, 1959, when the seven astronauts gathered at Cape Canaveral to watch their first rocket launch, which was similar to the one that was to carry them into orbit. It spectacularly exploded a few minutes after liftoff, lighting up the night sky. The astronauts were stunned, of course. Shepard turned and said to John Glenn, “Well, I’m glad they got that out of the way.”

My favorite quote was from a book about him, recalling an interview. When reporters asked Shepard what he thought as he sat atop the Redstone rocket, waiting for liftoff, he replied, “The fact that every part of this ship was built by the lowest bidder.”